I’ve Always Wanted to be…a Lumberjack!

My mom arrived home today after spending most of the week in Sedona, AZ for a medical conference. She does these conferences when there’s an opportunity, and it’s required to maintain her accreditations. This particular conference was on alternative medicines. She had expected there to be a lot of hooey, though as she admits now, it was really quite well documented and presented. New Agers can have marketing companies too, so I take it all in with a grain of saltpeter (good for your lungs, I think; but avoid sulphur for a bit). I do hope she talks more about this conference on her blog, it’s quite an interesting read, I gather. One thing she discussed with me was the orient’s interest in diet and defecation. Not so much the act, but rather the output of defecation. I know the part about the diet, because I’ve read a couple books on principles of yin & yang. Any such reference will, at least once, draw very clear boundaries between the yin & yang foods. She said that someone had told her that after every major meal, you should have a single log of output approximately the length of your forearm. I’m 6 ½ feet tall, so my forearm is about 12 inches from palm to elbow. We’re talking timber here if I’m supposed to output two to three foot-long logs a day. I’m no lumberjack, so that’s a lot of effort for me. I don’t know that I’ve ever had a single, foot-long log – much less three in a day.


  1. Honey…no one needs to know about your poop. Also, when you liken poop to timbers, hiking takes on a whole different meaning.

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