Amy’s birthday was celebrated this year at Medieval Times in Atlanta. I had heard some bad reports on Medieval Times in general, but nothing was going to stop me from experiencing it on my own. I’m certainly glad I did my own investigation. Medieval Times was a raucous good time for 8 friends that went. We ate like noblemen, screamed at knights, had the birthday girl dubbed lady of the realm by the king, and shopped through the wares of a medieval bizarre. I will say that you had better plan on spending around $150 a couple. It’s $50/person to get in – the food was very good and completely filling – there’s a big bar dishing out plenty of alcohol, and inevitably you’re going to want to remember the day with a special memoir; a picture, a certificate, or a souvenir. Despite the heavy cost, I really had a good time yelling at everyone in the arena. Some fighters were better than others, but all risked personal injury for our entertainment. They also do some nice horse work. There’s jousting, weapons combat, and some magic. If you can get over the cost, you really owe it to yourself to have a go at it.
I’ve been to the one in Austin and liked it. Ever seen The Cable Guy? I can’t go without thinking of that movie.
Steven: Can I get a knife or fork?
Wench: There were no utensils in medieval times, hence there are no utensils AT Medieval Times. Would you like a refill on that Pepsi?
Steven: There were no utensils but there was Pepsi?
Wench: Dude, I got a lot of tables.
Chip Douglas: The blue knight rules! The red knight sucks the big one! Down, down, down. Right knight goin’ down. Down, down, down. Red knight goin’ down.
Chip Douglas: Dos thus have thou a mug of ale for me and me mate, for he hath been pitched in battle for a fortnight and has the king’s thirst for the frosty brew dos thou might have for thus!
Steven Kovacs: What’s going on?
Chip Douglas: It appears that we’re going to do battle, Steven.
Steven Kovacs: Is this a normal part of the show?
Chip Douglas: No, but I gave all the knights free cable. They thought it would be cool if we went at it for a while.
Steven Kovacs: Is it safe?
Chip Douglas: Sure, that’s what the armor’s for. Come on.
Did I not get invited to go because I was deemed too old? Or was it because you were pretty sure I would be too raucous and embarrass everyone in the party? I could have brought my violin. They had those in medieval times.
Love,
Mom