Earlier, I said dog days are coming and I meant it. It has taken a while to get everything worked out, but Monday begins something a little different. A friend and I will commit ourselves to eight weeks of dry dog food-eating experimentation for the betterment of mankind. I know you have lot’s of questions, so I will attempt to answer many of them right here and now:
First the ‘Why?‘
I wholeheartedly believe mankind can do better than rice for impoverished nations, disaster relief, and the poor when it comes to nutrition. I am largely concerned that only the wealthy are able to truly afford the pleasure of good foods. Lastly, I believe that food is an addiction for which no relief is offered.
For eight weeks, two men of approximately 30 years will consume 2000-3000 calories in dry dog food in attempt to account for a near-complete nutritional allottment. In addition to the dog food, a diverse salad should be eaten once a day to account for the lack of fiber found in even the best dog foods. Should this prove insufficient to maintain the level of minerals in the body, a multivitamin will also be taken as recommended by the vitamin or a doctor. Because dry dog food has very little moisture in it, a great deal of water will be required. It is presumed that a target of one gallon should be sufficient for this.
‘What the Hell?‘
Yes, indeed. We have checked with doctors on our plans and intend on maintaining regular checkups throughout the 8 weeks for a way to calculate our progress. Among the tests performed, blood chemical analyses will help us in tracking what is entering into our bodies. As these results are provided to us, we’ll be able to provide additional data to you. Also, I’m well aware of what kind and quantity of crap is put into commercial dog food. However, rest assured that our dog food selection goes beyond what you can find in your average grocery store.
‘And Why Again?’
For the betterment of humanity! One day, when we’re accepting our Nobel Peace Prize, you’ll live in my reality. If this works, we’re a step closer to a pelletized food product being made for humans that a) the government can subsidize for emergency relief, impoverished nations, and the poor and b) could become a new meal replacement retail product for everyone. Think high energy and food efficiency. The outdoorsy types could dig that. Also, as a food product, it wouldn’t be addictive as most foods are today. It would not be marketed in the same way, nor would it have the accentuated flavors today’s snacks and foods have.
I have a question, which inspired a dream, which led me to the thought of eating dog food for eight weeks.